Florida Homeowners Association Terror

My neighborhood is stank. When I say “stank” in this context, I’m not referring to the HOA Board, the HOA Property Manager, or the neighbors. Yes, my HOA-governed neighborhood’s HOA, including the property manager, are stank. And surely some people believe that their neighbors are stank (stank in this context means attitude). But I am talking about odor in the neighborhood. It smells bad, intermittently.

When your Homeowners Association reigns their terror upon you, maintaining employment may become [more] difficult. Once your HOA chooses you, you become a never ending target for various community violations (the same violations you see throughout the neighborhood so you know you’re not alone in that aspect). Email threats. Attorney threats through the mail. Then, judicial threats. All of these wreak havoc on the stability you once had. And losing your job is the last thing you need when most of your problems are monetary. Poverty is punishing…and so is your HOA.

Previously, I asked if homeowners do research about HOAs before they move into an HOA community. This research is going to be difficult because there is no database for HOA complaints. And there should be at least one, especially for Florida.

You move into your new house. You buy some new things that better suit your space. This means some of your old stuff must go. Houses in Florida do not seem to have storage areas or enough closets, so it’s time for a garage sale. But wait! You cannot do that.

I never expected to get a letter about fines in my email. My “HOA e-mail address” is not for official business purposes. It is for miscellaneous bullshit that I don’t care to know about on a regular basis. This is why I don’t frequently check this email address.

Once again, we are reviewing HOA Community Standards for my neighborhood in Wimauma, Florida, which is located outside of Tampa in the South Shore area of Hillsborough County. Let’s see what they say about pets (emphasis mine):

Please watch this YouTube Video from Jared Jones if you are considering purchasing an HOA-governed house in Florida:

Assuming you check your email constantly year round, and assuming that you think your HOA is going to contact you with something important by email, and assuming that if your HOA did also contact you via snail mail, that they would actually send that mail to the house you live in in the neighborhood since they definitely know you live there because you have been involved with them through the courts and their attorney and they placed a lien on your house and were foreclosing on it, this is what a violation email looks like:

When you want to modify the exterior of what you thought was your house or your yard, you have to apply to your Homeowners Association Architectural Committee. Per my neighborhood, it is as follows (emphasis mine):

This series begins with the post, Rules for Thee: The Homeowners Association Community Standards. Moving on to “Prohibited Items,” this is what it says for my HOA-governed neighborhood (emphasis mine):