Florida Homeowners Association Terror

When you closed on your house located in an HOA-governed community, you agreed to things that you may not have imagined. Yes, you as a grown person—who likely made the largest purchase of your lifetime—signed up to have an abundance of rules for a property you thought you owned. These rules exist to create homogeneity for the betterment of the community, aka “to increase property values…or at least that’s what they continue to tell you. Look at the verbiage HOAs use (emphasis mine):

It is the intention of the ACC to maintain a high standard of exterior architectural appearance throughout the Vista Palms Community. The following guidelines have been set up to protect the integrity of the community for both the developer’s interests and the purchasers’ investment therein. Your adherence to these guidelines will help preserve the quality of Vista Palms.

However, if you have come to understand how rules work, rules are not for everyone. And they are often enforced arbitrarily. You can see this by driving through a community. But you will not truly know unless you know someone who the HOA has made an example of. Thankfully, I will demonstrate this through a review of my neighborhood in a series of posts, beginning with this one.

My HOA Community Standards document informs homeowners upfront that they don’t mean everything that they say. And even if they don’t say something, it may still apply to you (emphasis mine):

This Community Standards Document is established to assist the Architectural Control Committee (ACC) and Owners with procedures and guidelines through consistent and high quality design standards for the property alteration process. It supports and amplifies the Declaration of Restrictions and Covenants and other governing documents that bind each property Owner. It is provided to residents of Vista Palms for their future reference. This document is not intended to address all possible situations, alterations, etc…These standards do not cover every possible situation that may require ACC approval.

So, what does the Architectural Committee have jurisdiction over? Well, everything related to the outside of your house and the surrounding land as follows (emphasis mine):

Any exterior property alteration (to the home or the lot) requires the completion of an “Application to Architectural Control Committee” form that must be approved by the ACC. A copy of a blank application form is included in this booklet.

Examples of alterations include, but are not limited to:

•Awnings

•Brick pavers: location and color

•Changes to the exterior color of the home (painting)

•Exterior decoration applied above garage doors and fronts of homes

•Recreational or sporting equipment

•Fences

•Flag poles and antennas

•Front door: style and/or color

•Gutters: style, color

•Items in flowerbed besides plants

•Lanais, sunrooms and gazebos

•Lighting: placement and size

•Landscaping (refer to Article 4)

•Pools, spas, hot tubs, whirlpools

•Porches, decks and patios

•Roofing

•Screen Enclosures

•Home additions and exterior renovations

You bought/financed a house so that you could apply to your HOA to determine if you can make any changes to your house. Does that sound like something you own?

I imagine this scenario below to make myself laugh even though it isn’t the greatest analogy [because the car doesn’t stay on the lot in one community].

You buy a Ford Expedition. You decide you want change the color of the car from black to blue but you have to apply to the Ford Architectural Committee (FAC) first. They say yes because blue is safer than black (Why did they sell you a black car then?). But it has to be sky blue because it has to match the current fleet of Ford Expeditions. Your a/c stops functioning and so you leave the windows down all the time. The FAC tells you that you cannot have those windows down like that and they are going to fine you $1000. (They don’t have to do to this. They want to do this.) You are confused because there are other Fords drivers with their windows down but, apparently, they only have their windows down at night. A/C repair is $800 which you obviously do not have right now because, duh, why would you be having your windows down while it is 106 degrees outside. There are two nails in your left passenger tire and you get one used tire to replace it. The FAC sends you a notice that you aren’t allow to have mismatched tires on your Expedition because that doesn’t represent the “high standard” of the brand. But you don’t need four new tires plus you don’t have the money to replace them all in addition to needing a new $800 a/c and having to pay the $1k fine for having your windows down all day for the past few months. You play your music loud in your Expedition’s upgraded sound system while you try to come up with a plan for all your expenses. The FAC sends you a violation stating that the volume of your music is unacceptable for a person who drives a Ford Expedition and you will be fined $1000. You now have the money to get all new tires and to get the a/c fixed. You receive a notice from Ford Law Firm that your case has been referred to them and that you owe fines and attorney’s fees for multiple violations and if you don’t pay, they will take you to court to get a lien and/or take the car from you to sell it. But you own the it. What? At least you can just sell the Expedition because it has a value higher than other brands…except that people are now buying much older cars because they realized that there is better value in those. Plus, there are so many other Expedition-type vehicles on the market that are cheaper than yours and with similar features. Also, sky blue is like, so senior-citizen.